I'll be there
by Subject87
Summary: Jade makes a promise to Freddie, to always be there when he needs her, and a new friendship is formed as she helps him through the both the good and bad in his life.
1. Chapter 1

I looked down at the piece of paper in my hand and sighed, I wasn't sure why I'd kept it or why I was staring at it now but something about it wouldn't let me get rid of it. Instead I pulled out my phone, ignoring a curious glance from Carly and typed in the number, saved it as 'Jade' and put my phone back in my pocket as my mind wandered to about two hours ago.

_We'd been preparing to leave for Seattle, our work done and Steven humiliated, when I'd been approached by a girl black hair that had a green streak running through it, "Benson right?" she asked._

"_Um, yeah.."_

"_Jade." she said simply and thrust a piece of paper into my hands, "Call me if you need something, and I'll be there." she said, and glanced back to the brunette in the corner (Tori if I remembered right) and scowled. _

"_Uh, thanks." I said, slipping the piece of paper in my pocket and smiling, "I'll keep it in mind."_

I still wasn't totally clear on why she'd given me the number, but I figured it couldn't hurt in case I needed someone to talk to and lately I felt like Sam and Carly, my best friends and co-hosts of our web show iCarly, were drifting away from me and I was stuck with Gibby. Gibby was our odd friend who sometimes guest appeared on iCarly and had started hanging out with us. He was a nice guy, don't get me wrong, but I missed the days when it was just the three of us.

* * *

We didn't get home until the next day, it is an 18 hour drive after all and we needed sleep. When I got home I went straight to my room to avoid my mother, ( though I realized she might still be taking care of my aunt) I did that more and more often these days, and pulled out my phone and went straight to the contacts and stopped at Jade's name, my finger hovering above the call button. I took a deep breath, should I call her already? And what was I so eager to call her?

My finger slipped and I hit the call button "Crap.." I mutter before putting my ear up to the receiver.

"What?" came the voice of the girl I'd just met.

"Hey Jade I uh, just called to say hi.."

"Benson?" she asked in surprise.

"What? Didn't think I'd call?" I ask with a smirk that I know she can't see.

"No... I actually didn't." she said.

"You owe me ten bucks!" A girl's voice called.

"You bet if I would call?" I ask.

"Yeah, Vega bet you'd call, I didn't think you would."

I can't help but laugh a little, "Well sorry to disappoint."

"No actually... It's okay."

"Oh yeah?"

"I'm kind of... Glad you called, which doesn't happen very often."

We ended up talking for the next two hours about this and that until I found myself opening up about everything: How I'd been in love with Carly since I was eleven, how I'd almost died for her and we'd been together until Sam had convinced me I was just bacon (Jade had promptly called me an idiot for believing her) and I even ended up telling her how Sam was becoming crueler towards me every day

After I was finished ranting, which made me feel so much better, My new friend went silent for a moment, "Seems like you do actually need someone." she commented.

"I guess so... I mean, it never really bothered me much but once I got talking to you it was like I just couldn't stop.."

"Don't worry about it." she said, "It was...Sort of nice to listen."

"Sort of nice?"

"That's the best you get Benson." she growled.

"Alright, I can live with that."

We talked a little bit more until she had to go, we talked for almost three hours that day, and when she hung up I couldn't help but feel like a load had been lifted off my shoulders.

Over the next few days Jade and I talked more and more and Carly, Sam, and I talked less. The day of the school lock-in I went over to the Shay apartment "Hey guys."

"Hey stranger." Carly said with a smile, "Where have you been?"

"Oh sorry I just... I've just been busy."

"Well I've missed you." she said softly and my heart skipped a beat, when she did she ever miss me?

"I've missed you too Carls." I say.

"Hey Carls I need" she stopped when she saw me, "Look what the cat dragged in." she said angrily, "Just remember we existed?" She asked before heading upstairs.

"What's with her?" I ask.

"No idea.." She said with a shrug, "She's been acting weird since we got back from Seattle, keeps asking about you."

"Me?" The surprise on my face must be evident because Carly smirks.

"Yeah, you... You should go talk to her."

I sigh and head for the stairs, "Better have 911 on speed dial." I tell her.

She giggles, "Duly noted."

I trudge up the stairs like a man on death row and enter the iCarly studio quietly. "Sam?" I ask curiously.

"What do you want nerd?"

"I came to check if you're okay."

"So now you care?" She asked bitterly.

I look at her strangely, "Of course I care! It's you who doesn't give a damn."

"I don't?" she asked angrily.

"Sam, you HATE me" I pointed out, "Even my birthday cards say HATE, Sam, not Love Sam, HATE."

"Maybe I don't hate you anymore.." she mumbled.

"Of course you do-" I was cut off by her launching herself at me and grabbing my by the shoulders before locking her lips with mine. When she released me from the hold she looked at me expectantly and I did the only thing my confused brain could think of: I ran.

"Hey Fr- What's wrong?" The brunette asked me.

"Can't talk, gotta run." I said quickly and headed out of the apartment and Bushwell Plaza to the one place I knew I'd be safe: The old 'apartment' I'd rented from Lewbert once upon a time. My hands were shaking and my mind was racing as I called Jade.

"Freddie?"

"She kissed me!" I blurt, "S-She kissed me."

"Slow down, who kissed you."

"S-Sam!"

The line went silent for a minute, "She did?"

"Y-Yes."

"Sam who bullies you, hates you, and makes your life miserable?"

"YES"

"Okay, Calm down... Damn, she has an odd way of telling you she likes you."

"Yeah I know but... Jade I don't like her."

"You're in love with Carly still aren't you?"

"Of course I am!" I snap.

"Alright alright, so obviously you need to be tactful about this."

"Yeah..."

"Or y'know, you could crush her and show her how it feels"

"Jade!" I said in shock

"Well, it's an option." she finally said.

She was right, I could humiliate her right then and there... I could pay her back for all the chizz she's done to me over the years... The idea is so tempting, so amazingly evil... But I can't.

"Yo Benson." I hear on the line

"Sorry I.."

"What're you gonna do?"

"I can't humiliate her, I just have to let her down easy."

"You should humiliate her, it's what I'd do."

"I probably should.." I admit with a frown, "But I can't."

"You're a good guy Benson."

"So they tell me."

"Nice guys finish last."

"Aint that the truth?" I asked dryly. We said our goodbyes and I prepared myself to tell Sam how I felt.

I went back to the Shay apartment, where my blonde and brunette friends were watching T.V "Sam.. We need to talk."

She looked at me nervously and nodded while Carly just looks confused. I lead her up to the iCarly studio and sigh "Sam..."

"It's okay." She said with a soft smile.

"What do you mean?"

"I just mean... I'm not Carly."

I couldn't help but blink "You knew?"

"Oh come on Freddie, it felt like I was kissing a dead guy, and I know you can kiss better than that."

I feel my cheeks heat up and I smile, "You're a good friend... But I love her."

"I know." She said and smiles in amusement.

Before I can ask what's so funny I hear, "Love who?"

My blood runs cold and I freeze, no.. no..

"I heard my name, and then 'I still love her'" Carly said.

"I uhm.."

"You're still in love with me.." She said, and it sounds like she's accusing me of something but before I can explain she walks over to me "It's okay.."

"I.." My brain feels like it's turned to mush and then she kisses me, "You were never just bacon to me..." she whispered.

My throat feels dry but I smile and kiss her back, "That.." I say, "Is the best news I've heard all day."

She just shakes her head and giggles at me.

* * *

The next year flies by without me even realizing, Jade and I don't talk as much since I've started dating Carly and she's back with Beck (Something I regret; I must admit to missing talking to her but haven't had much time to call her), and suddenly Carly is offered a chance to go to Italy with her Dad. I don't want her to go, but at the same time this could be a great opportunity for her so I did what I always do when I'm conflicted, I turned to Jade.

"Her Dad want's her to go to Italy, but you want her to stay" Jade summarized after I told her what was going on.

"Pretty much."

I could almost feel the sarcasm in her voice, "And it didn't occur to you to tell her how you felt?"

"But this could be a great opportunity for her." I pointed out.

"Maybe, but sometimes you have to be a little selfish." She paused for a moment and just as I opened my mouth to reply she started talking again, "Look you're a great guy, but if you don't be a little selfish you're gonna lose her."

I nodded then realized I was on the phone and sighed, "You're right..."

"Of course I am, now go get your girl."

I hung up the phone and walked across the hall, I'd excused myself from the crazy hat party after Carly had agreed to go to Italy with her Dad, and pulled my girlfriend aside.

"Everything okay?" she asked worriedly.

"Sort of.." I tell her, "Listen, I know I said you should go but... I don't want you to go."

Her eyes light up and she looks... Relived "I was hoping you'd give me a reason to stay" she whispered and I said a silent thank you to Jade as we kissed.

* * *

The next four years went by quietly, Jade came to stay with us after she and Beck broke up again ("I was an idiot to think anything had changed" she told me one night during a movie) but she left, going back to Hollywood to focus on her singing and acting.

On our fourth anniversary I had reservations at the best restaurant in town and had the evening planned out. When I got home, Carly and I had moved into our own apartment in Bushwell Plaza last year, and I froze when I saw my girlfriend

She had dressed in a simple black dress that showed off her legs amazingly, and had applied just enough makeup to make her look even more beautiful than usual (if that was even possible which I didn't think it was) "Like what you see?" she teased.

"Y-Yeah..." I finally said when I could speak English again.

She giggled and shook her head, "Get dressed and we'll go."

I run into the bedroom and change into the black suit I'd bought just for this evening. I take a moment to smile, I'm 21 years old and am bout to graduate college and I have my dream girl. My life seems perfect and I couldn't be happier, but part of me wonders when it will go wrong.

We get to the restaurant and I open the door for her and wait until she's inside before slipping in. They take us to the table in the back and we engage in small talk, like how our day went and things like that. After dinner I grin as I pull out a small black box and kneel down on one knee "Carly Shay.."

She gasps "Freddie..."

"Marry me?"

She's crying now "Yes!" she says as I stand up and slip the ring on her finger and she kisses me.

The next day I text Jade and let her know I'm engaged, to which I get a congrats in reply, and then focus my sights on helping Carly plan the wedding.

* * *

We get married about a year later (after graduation); despite the headaches, the arguing, and the stress of trying to plan the damn thing and it's a beautiful day. She looked amazing in her white dress as she's walked down the aisle by Spencer. Her white dress complements her perfectly, though I think she always looks perfect so I can't judge, and I notice out of the corner of my eye Jade in the second row. She actually smiles at me, and I smile back though it looks like I'm smiling at Carly, and I exchange my vows with my fiancee.

"I do." she says, words I've been wanting to hear since I was eleven years old.

"I do." I reply and I kiss my wife (a title I thought I'd never use for Carly). The future is looking bright, and I can't wait to meet it head on.

* * *

**Note: **So this was inspired by the Megadeth song I'll Be There, Which I highly recommend looking up, so I don't own anything in this story except the idea to combine em. This was going to be a one shot, but I've decided to split it into a two shot and I'll upload the next chapter asap I promise. Please read and review!


	2. Chapter 2

I didn't get to talk to Jade until after my honeymoon, a rather nice week-long visit in Paris which Carly loved. When we finally got home I sat down on the couch and called Jade.

"Benson." she said simply.

"Hey Jade, long time huh?"

"You could say that."

"Yeah it's just... I haven't really had time to call anyone."

"So I've noticed." She said.

"I've missed our talks Jade."

I didn't really expect her to respond, but when she said, "So have I." I have to admit, I was surprised. "Once things settle down, Carly and I just got back from France, why don't you stay with us for a few days?"

"You went to France for you honeymoon?"

"Yeah."

"How?"

"I had some money left over from a little... incident with Daka shoes."

"I remember that, you promoted their shoe's flaws."

I couldn't help but grin at the memory, "Yeah, so they paid us each 30 grand to stop talking about the shoes."

"Wow Benson, I'm impressed."

I shrug, "We had some good fun."

"Are you continuing the show?"

"No um, we decided to end it when I proposed to Carly."

"Why?"

I sigh, "Because we won't have time for it, We're looking for jobs, considering starting a family... Everything comes to an end eventually."

"I guess you're right." she said.

"Of course I am." I tease and shake my head,

"Don't get cocky Benson."

"I never do."

We talk a little more, she tells me how her last tour went (she was doing well as a singer) and how she'd lost contact with most of her friends from Hollywood Art's except Cat.

"It doesn't really matter to me." she says, "But I do kind of miss Tori of all people, she was fun to tease because she could take it and dish it back."

I shake my head "You're weird."

"You're one too talk."

"I _know _I'm weird."

I hear a noise in the background and my friend says it's time for her to hang up, "Later Benson."

"Don't forget to come see me sometime huh? You, Carly and I can hang out."

"Sure."

"Bye Jade."

We hung up and I went into the bedroom to find Carly asleep, jet lag was a pain, so I quietly slipped into bed and closed my eyes as sleep over took me.

* * *

Sam came over a couple days later, after Carly had called her to let know we were home, "Yo Mrs. Benson!"

I shake my head as Carly blushes and heads for the door. Sam had been one of the bridesmaids, though she had fought like hell not to wear a dress and she hadn't stopped teasing Carly (lovingly of course) for falling for the geek next door.

The blonde walked in and shook my hand, we were on much friendlier terms now, and I smile "Nice to see you Puckett."

"Yeah, yeah, where's the ham?"

"Some things never change." I muttered.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"So Sam, what did we miss while we were gone?" My wife interjects.

"Oh nothing really.. I uh, got a boyfriend."

We both stare at her, "Who?"

She goes red, and I take a mental snapshot as Sam blushing is rare, "Spencer." she muttered so quietly I thought I'd misheard, "What?"

"Spencer!" she said louder.

Carly stood there, frozen, and for a moment I was tempted to shake her to see if she was still there. "You're with Spencer?"

The blonde nodded, "Yup."

"Even though he is way, _way _older than you?"

"Yup." She paused, "Um.. But his personality makes him younger than me."

I wanted to point out that I thought her logic made no sense, but I bit back the words and let Carly talk.

"Are you... happy with him?"

"Actually... Yeah."

"Then you should be with him."

I looked at both of them in confusion, then sighed in defeat "Well, as long as you're happy Sam."

We spent the next hour talking: We caught up on the events of Seattle, Carly told Sam about the week in Paris, and Sam and I make idle conversation for a while (which is nice as Sam and I, over the years since that day in the iCarly studio, have become really good friends). Finally Sam leaves and Carly and I have some time to ourselves, which is always nice.

She smiles at me and I feel my heart stop as I look into her brown eyes and I smile back, her smile never ceases to amaze me, "How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Make my heart stop with just a smile."

She giggles and leans over to kiss me, which makes my heart start thumping again, and I kiss her back. After we pull ourselves apart I smile happily, "You know I've wanted this since I was eleven... right?"

"I believe your exact words were 'I'm in love with you and you just wanna be friends, and I'm totally okay with living with that constant pain."

I can't help but smirk and shake my head, "You remember?"

"Oh... I remember everything Benson."

"That a fact?" I ask.

She stands up and shakes her head, "How about you come find out?"

So of course I follow.

* * *

A month later Jade surprised us with a visit (I was glad to see her, phone conversations weren't as good as face to face). "West." I say with a cocky grin.

"Watch it Benson."

"Maybe I will, maybe I won't."

We smile at each other and I hug her, I don't care if she likes it or not, and when I pull back I glance at the red streak in her hair, "Red suits you."

"Thanks, so where's the blushing bride?"

"She's at the grocery store, we needed some stuff."

"Sure she won't mind me staying?"

"I don't see why not, I've told her all about you."

She raised an eyebrow in my direction and I shrugged, "I don't keep secrets, especially from my wife."

"You are _whipped_." She said with a smirk as she plopped down on the black leather recliner beside her.

"So?" I asked, probably more defensively than I had intended.

She grinned again and I shook my head as the door opened and my wife came in looking exhausted so I walked over, grabbed the bags from her hands, kissed her, and headed into the kitchen.

When I walked back into the living room the two seemed friendly enough. "So Jade," I ask as I sit down beside Carly on the couch, "How long are you staying?"

"Oh just a couple days, I have another tour starting."

"Really? New Album?"

"No, I just wanna get out on the road, I love performing."

"I loved your last album by the way, bought it off the pear store." Her last album had been a collection of covers of her favorite songs (some of which I liked better than the original.)

"I need to listen to that..." Carly suddenly said, "I'm sure you're very good."

We talked for about another hour before I suggested a movie and Jade suggested 'The Scissoring'. The next two hours was spent watching a horror movie that terrified Carly (not that I was complaining, as she held me tight), disturbed me and fascinated Jade.

After the movie we introduced Jade to Spaghetti Tacos, which she apparently liked, and then spent the rest of the night watching T.V and talking.

When it was time for Jade to leave Carly and I drove her to the airport and I hugged her in goodbye. "You know I hate that right?" she asked in mock anger.

"So?"

"So knock it off."

"I don't think so."

She gives her best intimating glare, which years ago would have scared the pants off me, and I glare back before telling her goodbye and watch her get on the plane. "You two are good friends huh?" Carly asks from beside me and I squeeze her hand.

"Yup, if not for her, I'd have never gotten you."

"What do you mean?"

It was then that I realized I'd never told her what happened that day in the studio with Sam so I launched into a story about how when I'd gone up to the studio to see what was wrong with my blonde, at the time, tormentor and how she and I had talked and then she'd kissed me.

"She did what?" the beautiful brunette beside me asked

"She kissed me." I repeated.

"So that's why you were so freaked out..." She muttered.

"Right, anyway." I resume telling my story, "I ran down to the apartment I'd rented when I moved out of my mom's house and I called Jade and babbled about how Sam kissed me, and I had no idea what to do."

She let out a soft giggle and squeezed my hand "You babbled?"

"Yup, and she told me to tell Sam the truth... Which is when you over heard me and that's how we got together."

"Well, it seems I do owe Jade my happiness with you."

"Well, sort of... I think I should get some credit too."

"You do huh?"

"Well, I did tell you the truth when you walked in on me talking to Sam."

She paused to think, her face taking on this cute expression, and finally giggled, "Alright I suppose you get some credit."

I simply grinned and kissed her softly in reply.

* * *

About a year later I was coming home from work, I worked as a website designer and had just finished a big time law firm's website, and remembered I my phone was off. When I turned it on I got an alert that I had a voice mail. I pressed play and then the speaker phone button and my heart stopped at the message: "Hey Freddie," came my wife's voice through the phone, "You know how I've been feeling sick lately?"

I nodded to myself; Carly had been complaining that she felt sick to her stomach the last few weeks. "Well," she continued excitedly, "I went to the doctor today and... good news!" she said with a grin, "I'm pregnant!"

I nearly dropped the phone right there but then she kept talking, "I'm only a few weeks pregnant, and it's too soon to tell a gender, but I think I want it to be a secret... Well anyway, bye Sweetie! I'll see you soon, I love you." Then I heard the click of her hanging up.

The next 9 months are spent with me trying not to get on Carly's bad side, her mood swings were killer, but on October 21st, 2018 at 2:30 A.M by Carly.

"Freddie I think it's time to go.."

"Go where?" I asked dumbly.

"To the _hospital_"she said and grit her teeth, "The baby is coming."

I quickly get dressed and drive my wife to the hospital and get her admitted. I'm asked to leave, however, when they detect something wrong with her.

I paced the waiting room in the maternity ward and finally called Jade "Help me..." I say quickly.

"What is it?" She asked.

She already knew about the pregnancy, in fact we'd asked her to be Godmother to our child. "Carly's in labor... "

"Okay..."

"There have been some complications..." I'm starting to panic, saying it out loud makes it seem so much more real.

"Calm down Freddie, I'm sure she'll be fine."

"Yeah... I guess you're right just... What if she isn't?"

"Just keep thinking she's okay."

I nod and sigh, "Thanks... I'll talk to you later."

About twenty minutes later a doctor comes out and calls my name. He looks nervous as he stands there in his scrubs "I'm Carly Benson's husband." I say nervously, "Is she okay?"

He puts a hand on my shoulder and dread freezes my heart. "I'm sorry son.." He said and my frozen heart shatters like his words are a hammer, "We tried our best, but she didn't make it.."

"T-The baby...?"

"Your little girl is fine."

I smile bitterly, Carly had wanted a girl. "T-Thank you doctor.." The words are forced, right now I just want to strangle him. I walk over to the corner of the waiting room and go to call Jade, but instead I dial my voice mail. It rings for a moment before the computerized voice tells me I have one saved message.

"Hey Freddie! Remember how I was feeling sick? Well.." Her voice is interrupted by me hitting the end button: I can't take it... I. The tears start flowing then, making my vision blurry, and I head outside to get some fresh air. I wipe my eyes clean and dial Jade but I get her voice mail. "You lied to me..." I say quietly, "You FUCKING LIED TO ME, SHE'S NOT OKAY AND NOW NOTHING IS OKAY.."

I know I'm being harsh on her but I don't care, I've lost the love of my life and I'm not handling it well... I've never handled loss well and I needed something or someone to scream at...

I shut my phone off. I don't want to talk to Jade anymore and head back inside and fall asleep in my chair. I'm awoken by a hand on my shoulder; it's Jade... "What're you doing here?" I ask, "And what time is it?"

"Well I got your voicemail.." She said. "And it's 1:00 in the afternoon."

"Oh um..."

"No it's okay... I'm sorry Freddie, I'm so sorry..." Her dark eyes rarely show any emotions, but I can see she really is sorry.

"She's gone Jade... She's gone and I don't know what to do."

She hugs me and I hug her back, "I didn't even get to say goodbye..." I say.

"I know Freddie... I'm sorry.."

The tears come back and I feel like a wimp, but I don't care. "What am I gonna do?"

"Is the baby okay?"

"y-Yeah..."

"Then you're gonna survive and take care of that baby."

"I don't know how... I don't, what if I fail as a father?"

"You won't."

"How do you know?"

"Because I, despite not liking nor knowing anything about children, am going to help you."

"What about your tour?"

"It can wait..." She said softly, "You need me."

And for some reason that meant the world to me "She's going to be named Carly Jade Benson."

She smiled and shook her head, "You're such a dork."

"And proud of it." I say and I even manage to smile... barely.

"I'm starving, wanna grab a bite?"

"I'm not hungry..." I say.

She looks at me for a moment "Go eat." I tell her. She shoots me a concerned look but she nods and leaves. When she leaves I dial my voice mail again and press the phone to my hear to hear the love of my life's voice one more time..

* * *

**Note: **I know this was supposed to be a two shot, but there's just to much to put in two chapter sooo hopefully it'll be a 3 shot. Please R&R, I hope you enjoy the story and I don't own iCarly or Victorious.


	3. Chapter 3

[Freddie]

It's been three days since my wife Carly had passed away... three days since the world had ended for me. I held my baby, our baby, in my arms and smiled softly. She'd been kept in the hospital for the better part of two days for observation but now she was home and I was, well I was a little happier. I hear footsteps approaching from the kitchen "Jade?" I ask.

Jade, one of my best friends and godmother to Carly Jade Benson, is staying with us for awhile to help me take care of Carly. "The funeral is today." She tells me in a somber voice.

I look up and nod "I'll... I'll get ready." I tell her and gently place Carly in Jade's hands before heading upstairs. When I'm sure Jade is out of earshot I press one on my phone and let the saved voice mail play.

"Hey Freddie, know how I've been feeling sick lately?' Carly's voice asked me through the phone and I desperately want to answer but I can't. "Well..." I hang up the phone, I haven't been able to finish the voice mail since she died, and toss it on my bed so I can put on my suit.

I come down stairs and smile softly at Jade who's wearing a black dress that I have to admit looks nice on her, "Thank you." I whisper as I take Carly back "I don't know what I'd do without you." I remember when I first met her she'd scared me to death, along with pretty much everyone, but once I'd gotten to know her (and time had mellowed her out) she was one of the most dependable people I'd ever met.

Before Jade can reply someone knocks on the door who turns out to be my mother when Jade opens the door, "Hey Mom, meet Carly Jade Benson." I say softly. I wish I could have introduced the two under better circumstances, but my Mom had been taking care of her sister when my daughter had been born. " This is Jade." I say, motioning towards my best friend, "She's Carly's godmother."

"Freddie have you made sure her nursery is at the right temperature?" She fretted and started going through a long checklist I was in no mood to hear.

"I know how to raise my daughter." I say through gritted teeth, "Let's go, I want this day to be over." And with that I walk out the door."

Like most days in Seattle it's cold and rainy but today I don't mind, I'm to numb to notice the cold anyway. I glance back at the car seat which is holding the only thing that's kept me from completely falling apart: my Daughter. The funeral home is made of brick, and I can't really remember the name of it, but it's one of the nicest in Seattle and Carly deserves the best.

Just outside the funeral home, waiting for us, is Sam and Spencer with their little boy Steven who was six months old now. "Puckett." I say with a grin, "Or is it Shay now?"

"You know it's Shay nub." She said softly, "I just wish..."

"I know." I reply and we hug tightly, the two remaining members of our trio, and I shake Spencer's hand. " Let's get inside..." Mom is carrying baby Carly and Sam can't help but notice her eyes.

"That's your cousin." She tells her little boy, "and this is Uncle Freddie, remember Uncle Freddie?"

We don't get to see each other that often, so he probably doesn't remember me, but I still manage a smile and he giggles, having no idea what's going on, and then we head inside. The inside of the funeral home is nice; the walls are painted white and the windows allow enough sun light through the windows that no lights are needed during the day. The ceiling is also bland, I guess that a funeral home doesn't really need fancy woodwork. The floor has red carpeting and a rug of the same kind going down the middle of the room that splits the chairs into two isles.

I glance back at my Mom who whispering to her granddaughter before bumping into Colonel Shay. "Freddie" He whispers as he pulls be into a hug "You made her happy... you know that don't you?" ?

I suddenly feel like the weight of the universe is on my shoulders- I haven't seen my Father-in-Law since he'd come to visit, and offered to take Carly to Italy, "I...I hope so." Is all I can think to say.

"You seem like a good man Benson, I'm proud my little girl could find someone like you." His words leave me speechless, especially considering I feel the exact opposite. "I'm sorry for your loss."

My brain left me at that moment, "I'm sorry..." I tell him, "I'm sorry for your loss." I excuse myself and head to the front, to be alone. Not even a minute later I feel a hand on my back, I don't even need to look up to see who it is. "Jade." I say softly, "Shouldn't you be... doing something?"

"I am, I'm taking care of my friend."

"And here I thought you were a tough, badass girl." I tease.

"Time smooths out the edges." she replies dryly.

"It does?" I ask, perhaps a little to hopeful. I get a sympathetic look and a pat on the back but no answer, so I'm hoping that's a yes (I'm feeling optimistic) and I try to smile, but it just doesn't come. "I miss her..."

" I know."

"It's my fault she died."

She turned her attention back to me and I'm surprised at how soft her eyes look now, when we'd first met there'd been something in them that scared me- now she looked totally harmless. "Explain." she said.

"If I'd never gotten with Carly then she would have never died."

"If you hadn't gotten with Miss Goody Two Shoes you'd be miserable."

"I'm miserable now." I point out.

"Fair enough, then it's my fault."

"Explain." I tell her with a mock smile.

"I told you to go for it, to tell her how you feel, and that's how you got together."

I shake my head, "Alright I get your point... I just, what could I have done differently?"

"Nothing really... It's cold, it's hard, but it's the truth, you couldn't have done a damn thing differently."

I know she's right, and that's probably what makes it difficult to accept, but still my mind tells me I didn't try hard enough, that I could have done something- anything.

"Let it go." She whispers gently.

"What?"

"I can see the guilt and thoughts of what you could do differently in your mind- let it go."

"It's not that easy."

"I know, but it can be done."

"How do you know?"

"I've lost family before." She said, keeping her voice level.

"Oh really?" I ask, my attention fully on her at the moment.

"My aunt." she said simply, "We were close for a few years, she died right after I graduated."

"I'm sorry."

"I put it behind me, I miss her but... I found other things to focus on- things that helped me move on."

"I think if it wasn't for Carly Jade I'd fall apart."

"Then focus on her, make her your reason for keeping it together for now, then one day you'll move on. You'll miss her but there will be someone in your life to fill the whole she left behind. I promise."

* * *

[Jade]

I pat Freddie's knee and sighed, I wish I could help him though this but there isn't really a lot I can do for him. I've never loved someone the way he did Carly- and considering what he's going through I don't think I want too.

Carly was a damn good friend, and we got along pretty well, granted the only thing we really had in common was Freddie, truth be told I was jealous of her. I think sometimes, especially before they got together, she didn't realize how lucky she was to have a great guy like Freddie. I remember the nights we'd spent talking and a smile managed to form on my face before I shook my head and headed back to sit with him but I stopped when I noticed a certain blonde (and former tormentor of my friend) sitting with him.

I knew he would want alone time with someone who knew Carly better than anyone, except of course him, so I headed to the back and let him have some time with his Seattle friends. I thought back to the days at Hollywood Arts, Beck was a painful memory I tried to keep out but it didn't usually work out that way, and I wish I'd been kinder back then. One of my biggest regrets, I have to admit, is how I treated Tori and Cat who had tried to do be nothing more than my friend. I still was in contact with Cat but the brunette half Latina and I didn't talk so much anymore after she had finally given Beck a chance (last I'd heard they had two kids and were happily married). Cat and Andre had, oddly enough, gotten together but he seemed to take care of her more than anything.

I don't know what happened to Trina or Robbie, I don't really care either, but I do miss some of the things we'd went through at the performing arts school. A tap on the shoulder snaps me back to reality and I notice it's Spencer, I've only met him once or twice but he seemed nice enough, if not completely odd.

I'm hesitant about talking to the brunette in front of me but Sam is off talking to Freddie and I don't want to bother Dad right now. "Um, Jade I just uh.."

"You need someone to talk too?" She guesses.

"How'd you know?"

"Because this is your sisters funeral and you're wife is talking to your brother-in-law and your Dad is probably suffering in his own way."

I nod, "You're good." I have to admit. "I just... all those times I started a fire, she could have died in any one of them but yet she survived, she even almost had a hammer sent through her skill but she got lucky and dodged it." She didn't speak as I took a breath, "So why couldn't she live through this?"

My little sister had been one of the most precious things in the world to me, besides of course my wife and children, and I hated the fact that it seemed her luck had run out just when she would be needed most. "It isn't fair..."

"It rarely is." Jade finally speaks up .

I look down for a moment before gradually lifting my head up to look at her, "Thanks. How are you doing kiddo?"

"I'm fine." she said, "Carly and I were friends but not that close really, I'm more worried about Freddie."

"Yeah, the poor guy is taking it roughly." I comment, "He's been in love with her since he was-"

"Eleven." she finished.

We smile softly and I notice Freddie and Sam are done talking, "If you'll excuse me."

* * *

[Sam]

I always thought Carly would outlive me if I'm being totally honest with myself; she was the good girl, the one that never (okay rarely, and most of the time it was my fault) got in trouble. I, on the other hand, was a trouble maker and had been to juvie more times than I can count.

"It's not fair." I mutter as my hand slides across the coffin and I shake my head. We had fought, a lot, but she was my best friend and my sister (technically my sister-in-law, but who cares?). I walk over to Freddie, who is now somehow oddly in the same family as I am, and I pat his back gently, "Hey Freddie."

He looks up at me with a small smile, "No lame nick names?"

"Not today."

"Thanks.."

We chat for a few minutes, reminisce about the insane stuff we did on iCarly, about Carly, and we even discuss setting up one last iCarly as a tribute to her. "I'll let you know." I promise before hugging him, "Don't be a stranger, friends have to stick together in times like this." He gives me a nod and I walk back to grab Spencer- The minister is going to say something soon then it's time for the final goodbyes.

* * *

[Freddie]

The pastor doesn't say much, and the idea of her being in a better place doesn't do much to sooth me so I just sit and nod. After the service I go up to the casket and close my eyes _Goodbye Carly _I think as my hand touches her cheek softly and I can't help but wince at how cold she feels (and I make a note to never have a open casket funeral again) before leaving the funeral home.

It's windy at the cemetery where we put Carly's casket and I stay for about half an hour before heading home with Jade. Carly Jade started crying on the way home and my Mom spent the entire drive home trying to soothe her., finally we dropped Mom off at Bushwell Plaza (ah the memories) and I headed home with Jade who'd crawled into the back seat and was not attempting to get the baby to stop crying.

When we got home Carly Jade had finally stopped crying, "Thank you." I whisper as I get out of the car, "I owe you."

"Damn straight you do." she whispered "Dinner tonight?" She asked curiously, "I'm starving and poor."

"Pizza on me." I offer with a grin.

"Fine with me."

She takes Carly Jade up and I head inside to grab a beer, it's been one of those days. She comes back down and grins, "So a deal on the pizza?" She asks.

"Deal." I reply.

She sits down and I dial to order a pizza, maybe not such a bad ending to a terrible day.

* * *

**Note: **So here's chapter 3 of I'll be There, I hope you guys enjoy this and I hope you enjoy what I come up with next. I don't own iCarly or Victorious (oh how I wish I did) big thanks to my beta reader PD31 who makes these stories readable. Please read and review!


	4. Chapter 4

"Daddy!" Came the voice of my three year old from the kitchen as I walked in the door from work. I'd gotten a job as a computer programmer for a big league company about a week after Carly Jade had been born, it was my dream job but I didn't feel the passion for it like I had when I was a kid, most days my daughter is the only thing that kept me going.

"Benson." Jade said dryly though she was smiling as she finished up the dishes, Jade helped me out around the house and babysat Carly J while I was at work. She'd semi retired about six months ago which meant she still recorded but didn't tour, and only appeared in the occasional play or movie. When I'd asked her if that's what she really wanted she told me "You'd be totally lost without me Benson, and someone's gotta keep an eye on you and Carly J."

That had been the end of that conversation.

"How're my two favorite girls ?" I ask with a bright, but forced, smile on my face. Today was Carly J's third birthday and the third anniversary since her mother's death, something that never failed to hit me like a ton of bricks every year.

"Look!" Carly said excitedly and pointed at the picture she was currently scribbling all over. "Look!" She repeated.

"I see baby" I said softly and kissed her forehead, "It looks real pretty." She grinned at me and went back to her drawing, so I headed over to the fridge for a bottle of water, "How was your day Jade?"

"Oh you know.. _annoying" _She teased with a smile, "Carly was great, we watched Dora and colored all day."

"Well well, who knew that Jade West had a soft side?" I asked playfully.

"Well, I always loved kids- and once I out grew the 'I hate everyone' stage, yeah I developed a soft side." She replied.

"It's nice to see." I admitted and took a drink of my water, "Carly loves you."

Before she could reply Carly spoke up, "Daddy! Mommy! Park!"

I froze, had she said Mommy? My eyes flew to Carly, then back to Jade, "M-mommy?" I echoed curiously.

"S.. She's been calling me that when you're not around, just the last couple of days." She said, "I've tried to tell her not to but she insists on it."

"I-It's okay.." I lied, "At least it's you and not Sam or something." I tried to joke before turning to Carly, "We'll see about going after your birthday party alright?" I asked. Carly nodded excitedly and I glanced over at Jade who gave me a smile that looked as awkward as I felt, "I'll be right back Carly" I said, "I gotta get your present!"

"Yay!" She exclaimed as I headed upstairs to get her present.

When I came back downstairs a familiar sight greeted me: Sam and Spencer with their son Steven and their daughter Jennette who had been born four months ago had come by for my daughter's birthday party. "Hey guys" I greeted with a grin

"Fredweird." Sam greeted me with a playful smirk

"Hey Kiddo, what's up?" Spencer asked me.

"Freddie! We should hang out more bro." Came Gibby's voice from behind Spencer.

"Gibby! I didn't see you there." I said with a laugh

"Gibbaaay" He said in response, making me laugh again- it was nice to see some things didn't change.

"Cake!" My three year old daughter said excitedly.

"Right, the cake." Jade said, "Freddie, why don't you go get the cake so Carly can make her wish?"

I nodded and went to grab the cake, a chocolate one with white icing and decorated with blue, pink, and yellow flowers and a white and pink candle shaped like a three. "Happy Birthday Carly!" Jade said as she sat the cake down on the table, "Make a wish and blow out your candles."

Carly closed her eyes and took a deep breath, puffing out her cheeks,and blew as hard as she could on the candles. We all clapped as the candle went out and the birthday girl clapped and then we all sang Happy Birthday and began to hand out presents.

Spencer gave her an art kit and told her he'd teach her how to be an artist, Gibby gave her a doll that Jade had helped him pick out, Jade gave her a copy of James and the Giant Peach on Blu-ray, Sam ended up giving her another doll that Spencer had helped her pick out.

"I was gonna give her a pound of bacon." She said with a shrug, "But Spencer convinced me that three year olds aren't into bacon, which is sad.."

I rolled my eyes, "Thank you Spencer."

The eccentric artist nodded before Carly said, "Park!" again.

"Anyone against going to the park?" I asked.

That evening, after putting Carly to bed, I plopped down on the couch and began flipping through my camera, looking at the various pictures Jade had snapped of Carly opening her presents when I felt someone sit next to me.

"She looks more like her Mother everyday." Jade commented as I finished looking through the photos and set the camera down.

"Yes, she does." I paused and looked at her, "I wish she was here.. I try to lie to myself and say it gets easier every year but, it doesn't... It gets harder and now Carly Jade is calling you.."

"Mom." She finished for me.

I nodded and leaned back in my seat, "Don't get me wrong, if she was going to call anyone but Carly Mom I'm glad it's you but... "

"You don't want Carly to be forgotten."

"No... No I don't, and since when did you begin finishing my sentences?"

"Since now apparently." My best friend said dryly, "You're just getting predictable Benson."

"No way in hell am I getting predictable West, you just know me too well." I growled playfully.

"Works for me."

I shook my head and sighed, "You want some tea or something?"

"Coffee"

I rolled my eyes, "Of course." I muttered before heading into the kitchen to get us a drink

[Jade]

I bit my lip and watched Freddie disappear into the kitchen, _off limits West _I mentally scolded myself, and looked down at my hands- suddenly I had no idea what to do with them, should I put them in my pocket? My lap?

I wasn't able to decide because just then Freddie walked back in with two cups of coffee, "That was fast." I commented.

"It's instant." He apologized, "I didn't feel like pulling out the coffee machine."

"I hate instant." I whined jokingly, if it was coffee I'd most likely drink it. I sipped at the hot beverage and nodded, "But this'll do."

"It better." He said dryly, "Or you can make your own damn coffee."

"How Rude!" I scolded playfully.

"Yeah but, you deserved it."

"I did huh?"

"Yup, you complained about my instant coffee."

I let out a giggle, which was still way out of character for me, "Well you made instant coffee."

"Fair enough.."

I punched his arm lightly and set my coffee down, "I know today's both happy and painful but... Let's try to make it more happy than painful?" I suggested

"What do you suggest?" He asked, turning his full attention to me and setting his coffee mug beside mine.

"I don't know I just, I thought you might need to take your mind off things."

"Taking my mind off things would be.. great really... I just, I hate that my little girl's birthday is ruined by the fact that her mother died on the same day... It's not fair to her and, I want to forget it because I want my little girl to be happy and I know she notices I'm not happy.."

I nodded as he ranted and bit my lip, I had to be insane for considering this but I leaned over and softly pressed my lips against his. _What are you doing ?! _My consciousness screamed, but I ignored it, instead I placed my hand on the back of his head and pulled him into the kiss.

At first he returned the kiss, and I let myself relax as the kiss got a little more passionate, then he pulled away, a sad but thoughtful expression on his face, "I can't... I'm sorry I just can't.." he told me before heading upstairs.

I sighed and watched him leave, "Way to go West.." I muttered before heading into the kitchen, I could tell I was gonna need something a little stronger than coffee.

[Freddie]

I headed straight for my bedroom, I always went there when I needed to be alone, and groaned as I collapsed on my bed- suddenly exausted- and flipped on the lamp on my nightstand to look at the picture of Carly that sat beside it.

The kiss with Jade had felt good, really good- and that scared- I felt like I was betraying Carly. I know it's been a few years since she passed away but I can't shake this feeling that somehow... Kissing Jade back betrayed Carly.. "I wish you were here." I muttered at the photo, "Because I'm more than confused and I could use your help..."

I turned the lamp off and rolled over, hopefully a good nights sleep will clear things up.

* * *

**Note: **Sorry for the delay, between not having any inspiration, family coming up, and my back log of video games I've been insanely busy but I'm working on updating And All That Was and I'll begin working on iGo Hollywood soon! As always I own nothing in this story, please read and review!


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